if ever there was a gift...

You are it. I mean it. The older I get, the less I care about presents and the more I care about the gifts that I already have. Gifts like your friendship, this amazing sisterhood that you and I have. I really love you. I hope you had a great day with your family. Merry Christmas friend.

Thank you soul sister...

Thank you sooooooooooooooooooooooooo much dear friend. Your package couldn't have been any more amazing. We had so much fun opening it. (I don't usually wait to open the gifts we get in the mail, we rip them right open!!!) Jack loves his book, we read it before bed and played the little game. It is so sweet. Isa loves the cookies, she was pretending to eat the gingerbread ones. You should really sell them on Etsy, Catherine, they are so adorable. They are beautiful and I can feel your love when I look at them. And the little containers they were in! Do you know that Zena's gypsy tea is made here in Ojai? I have met the woman and she is really great.
So thank you so much for everything. I can not wait to dip that luscious brush in paint and dive into an incredible painting. Everything about that package was so fabulous, the book looks really intriguing- I have been in need of a good book lately.

My package to you guys is not as well put together- I was really wishing that I could have put more things in there for you. I was feeling a little bad b/c your package to us was so beautiful. Really, everything about it was marvelous. From the bag you made for Isa's food to the granola! It was really special and I was in heaven opening it.

Thank you so much for bringing such beauty to my life. Your friendship is more than I could have ever hoped for. You are an amazing friend and you are always close in my heart, even if we are not close in miles. Geography means nothing. Thank you for your love and sweet thoughtfulness. I hope you get my package soon.

How are you doing otherwise? I loved your last post. We have made window stars. So fun. By the way, it was 78 degrees today, hot. I was pissed. Too warm for christmas time. I really wish we had snow here now, so does Jack.
xxoo Love you.

Christmas ideas

Dear Diary:

I wanted to share with you some lovely ideas of things you can do with your family to bring some meaning and less spending back into this season. I've been thinking a lot lately about Christmas in my father's or grandparents age in Europe. They didn't have Santa Claus or stocking stuffers or door crashers or Black Friday (I still think that is a weird name for a shopping day).

They had traditions, special food, music, family, special linens, little treats, a Christmas tree that wasn't put up until Christmas Eve and a feast to celebrate the season on Christmas day. What happened to all of that? I have been asking myself.


Well, last year, we began to take back the Christmas season for what it really is and focus more on special celebrations, handmade gifts, little treats like roasted chestnuts over the fire and putting less emphasis on Christmas presents and more on the "Child of Light." So here are some things that we do in our home that are making this time really special and not so expensive.

1. We celebrate Advent or the coming of the Light. If you are not inclined to celebrate Christ's birthday, this is also the time of solstice, or the coming of the light. Beginning on the 1st Sunday of Advent (we are now on the 3rd, but it's never too late), we set up an advent wreath with 4 candles.

The first Sunday is to celebrate the mineral kingdom. So you would put out seashells, special stones and a couple of gnomes since they are the ones working in the elemental places of the earth.

The second Sunday is the plant kingdom. So you would put out a special plant or start putting your greenery on the wreath.

The third is the animal kingdom. Bring out the animals for the stable or make something to go on the wreath. In Liam's school, a special animal comes to visit. Last year it was a cow, this year a puppy. Maybe go to a petting zoo or a farm to celebrate.

The fourth Sunday of course is the people or the child of light. You can make a little child to put in your stable or for the centre of the wreath. Children don't care about religion so much, but they do resonate with a special child arriving.

Some other ideas that we love:

1. Attend a Waldorf Christmas Fair. It doesn't look like the School in Santa Barbara had one, which is so odd to me, but maybe they will next year? This is such a special event in our school.

2. Make some window stars (as shown above). They bring so much light to the house and are so beautiful for the children to make. You will have a few coming your way in the mail, Liam wanted to make one for Jack and Isa.

3. Celebrate St. Nicholas Day

4. Make your gifts. Some of my favorites are:

-fort building kit which included home made giant bean bags, old sheets and play clips
-King or Queen cape for dress up
-A jar of dried flowers, lavender, shiny stars, pebbles for making "potions"
-knitting a small blanket for your daughter's baby or dish clothes for her kitchen

5. Go to a family service for Christmas eve. These are not so preachy, they are more just singing and a little play. They are usually only an hour long and happen around 5:00pm.

6. Find a few special books that you can read together during this season, or better yet, write a story for your children. We have a sweet one that was written by another parent, I'll send it to you.

It is so hard when we are bombarded with X-Mas hoopla only for everything to go 50% off the day after. It is such a feeling of let down, but it doesn't have to be. I know money is tight, we're with you sister, but a few of these ideas make such a difference for everyone.

I'd love to know what some of the things you to as a family are special. I love you so much.

p.s. My computer doesn't seem to want to download my pictures, so this window star isn't mine, but you will see it soon....

How was your weekend?

Oh, to have a weekend away. Sounds so amazing. I can't wait to hear about it...

Downward facing dog and other life poses...

Sorry I didn't ring this afternoon. The day got away from me and John is away for the next few days... But I wanted to send some pictures of our life throughout the past week- over my dad's visit and halloween. I will write more when I am feeling eloquent and creative, at this moment I am not. I just want to crawl into bed, eat cake and read. Unfortunately, we have no cake.

wish you were here

Dear Diary:

It is really beautiful here. The leaves are all changing, the air is crisp, the tights and skirts are cozy and the fire is good company. I took the kids out the other day for a walk and took this really funny picture of them. It speaks so much to who they are. My son the naturalist, always looking at the plants, trees, leaves (he calls them the fall lanterns), so calmed by nature, it's really powerful for him. My daughter, who also loves to be outside, who inside is turning into a bit of a fashionista. She had just taken her hat off while she was walking towards me, she looks like she belongs in a catalog, carefree and happy on an autumn day. I would never to that to her, but it's pretty funny to see them from the other side of the lens. We went home and had tea and cookies, I love, love, love this time of year. What is it like in your neck of the woods or beach I should say?

what do we Canadians do when it gets cold?

Dear Diary:

I was laughing at myself last night as Stefan and I crawled into bed together, not for a romantic evening, but to keep warm and to watch Californication. As I ran downstairs to get a more substantial snack (the salad I ate previously just wasn't doing it), I was laughing at the whole thing. We have this big, lovely house. But it is also an old house, one that in an ongoing project to figure out how to keep warm. Our hydro bills in the winter can reach up to $400.00 if we are not careful. So instead of sitting in the living room, where we could have built a fire, we turned down the heat, tucked in the kids and stayed warm under the down duvet whilst watching a marginally sleazy show if it weren't for the great one liners.

You Californians must think we are so funny, I still can't believe that it has been in the 90's there. You're hitting the beach while I'm putting on an extra layer. Tights and corduroy skirts are my winter uniform, oh and those pants that I didn't really have any say in purchasing. The funny thing is, despite the chilly house, the ridiculousness of our hot/cold duvet, there is something about this time of year that I just love and I wouldn't have it any other way. Well, maybe I would have a real TV and not have to watch shows on the laptop, but that's for later.

Love you.

The Ring of Fire

So I'm in my group tonight and a mama brings in her new baby and is there to tell her birth experience to the group. Well, the topic of the ring of fire comes up and it hits me. I am currently in the ring of fire. Or maybe I am the ring of fire right now. Things are intense and I'm having to totally push through them. I am having to push through the fire and breathe. Breathe really well. So, I am sorry I have not rung you back. Things are busy, intense, and I feel as though I haven't had a free moment in the past 48 hours. I have wanted to call, maybe we can talk tomorrow.
How are you, Diary? How is life? I really want to talk with you about the visualization. I have not forgotten...I love you. I wish we could sit together at happy hour somewhere and tie one on...Smooch.

Wonderful laughter

It went so well. Actually, better than I thought it could. I woke up yesterday morning, determined to face the day from a place of knowing, rather than not knowing. It worked. I loved our conversation. Thank you for your words of encouragement, and that laugh! Wow. I haven't laughed that hard in a really long time. It totally opened me up, like a good cry. I felt really open and receptive, i think b/c of that laugh, the next day. I couldn't make it to Starbucks on the way, but what should the first couple carry coming in that morning? Starbucks cups! Perfect. And the flow I had with my co-teacher went really well. Smooth, and we had a great balance. I gave up trying to please her and focused on doing what felt magical to me. It felt great. My spirit definitely came out. I had so many thoughts and revelations come up. Let's talk. I love you...By the way, I don't know who these women are, but I loved the picture.

foodie country

So, I mentioned that we are in foodie country here. It's pretty amazing how people from all over the world are starting to flock here because of the slow pace of life, amazing wineries and cideries, local organic foods, and well, the scenery too. This is one of our favorite places to go. Merridale Cider. This cider is not to be mistaken for the liquor store cider. This is an estate cidery with heirloom apples that are all pressed and processed on their land. It is amazing. They also have a restaurant and in the summer months they have pizza night. We went again this year and had a great time. I should have taken a picture of the pizza but it is all wood oven baked and absolutely heavenly with a good glass of cider to go with it. Along with the other amazing places to eat and drink, I will take you here for sure when you come!

Too funny...

Just read both of your blogs. I am laughing out loud from the last one. So true, until she gets PMS or hormonally challenged or feels completely resentful that she is doing all the work.Until she starts wanting to be served breakfast in bed, realizing that there needs to be more balance... Then she goes on a rampage and leaves like Thelma and Louise...

wouldn't you love to have a wife?

She would cook and clean for you, do your laundry, remember all of your favorite things. The fridge would always be stocked, dinner on the table, children happy. She would keep the house tidy, remember what you told her about your day and never, ever forget a special occasion. Oh, and she would do nice things for you, just because. She would buy you flowers, for no particular reason and make you a cup of tea when you needed it most. She would let you sleep in, even though she had been up all night with the kids and happily send you on your way when you wanted to spend time with your friends. She wouldn't leave her clothes on the floor, because she would know how much that irritates you and she would love to take you shopping. When you go away on trips, she would organize everything, even the groceries the kids would like to eat and make sure that there was gas in the tank and cash in the wallet.

Today was our anniversary...I bought flowers, made a cake and cooked a pasta dinner even Jamie Oliver would have liked. As I was sitting down at the table with the words "but we went away for the weekend" still ringing in my ears, I thought to myself, it would be so nice to have a wife. Wouldn't you like one too?

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, I really do. I can't imagine my life without him and I am so happy to celebrate this day with him. However, I would still like a wife, it must be nice.

I have the best friend in the whole wide world

Dear Diary:

I mean it. You really are. I am so glad that the fairy sent you a lovely package, you deserve it! I couldn't stop laughing at the idea of you having a tea party with yourself, well, us, well, maybe we both are "away with the fairies."

I hope you enjoy those cups, for whatever you put in them. Tea, water, a little nip whilst cooking supper...we all need beautiful things in our lives and we all need those exciting brown packages on our door steps from time to time. They are reminders of how much someone loves us, and thinks about us and knows how special it makes us feel. Don't we all want to feel special sometimes? I know that sounds so corny, but it's true.

This past weekend in Tofino, I say is my heart place. The place where, whenever I go, as soon as I can see the ocean and the surfers playing in it, peeking through the trees from the highway, I instantly feel elated. I love it there, like no other place. You are my heart friend, if you were a place, you would be Tofino. I can't wait to be with both of you, together next summer.

Thank you for listening to me today and for understanding. I really do love you.

A little fairy sent me the best package....

Dear Diary,
I just received the best package from my marvelous friend who lives in a far away land. But she doesn't seem that far, it seems as though I could just reach out and touch her-our energies are so in sync...Well, she sent me the most fabulous package a girl could ask for. I love it. I love the purse, love the owl. And love the pottery!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What gorgeous colors, I am going to make a pot of tea this afternoon and pretend I am British and have tea time with my gorgeous new cups. I am going to pretend that my friend is with me, and that we are eating chocolate and shortbread with our highly caffeinated tea. I am going to pretend that we are laughing, and gabbing, and laughing some more. My kids will think that I am nuts, having gone off the deep end laughing and talking to myself in the kitchen. Or maybe they will just imagine that I am having tea with my imaginary friend. That will be a suitable explanation for them. And I will be happy, drinking my tea, gazing out the window, imagining the time when we can meet in her far away land and laugh at all of the crazy hippies and waldorf nazis.

Breathe

Sometimes we're just tired. Just let yourself feel that way. Give in to it, feel what you need to feel. It will go away. You probably just need some good old fashioned alone time to give yourself attention...I love you. Most likely, light will be created from any darkness.

Love our idea

So the idea has been brewing. Steeping. Flowing it's flavor into my cup. I'm excited. I can see the article on those shiny pages in Mothering. It will happen if we want it to.

I think we should both start writing and then email each other what we have. Melt it together to make a great piece. You use your vision from your ruby slipper project and I'll use mine from my group.

Who knows? Maybe there is a book on the horizon...

did I deserve this?

Ok, your last post had me laughing so hard, I couldn't stop. Not that your misfortune or ridiculous camping trip is something to laugh at. But COME ON! That is an unbelievable series of unfortunate events! If I were there right now, I would bring you chicken soup, good juice and some really good movies.

So you asked about my weekend? Well, I've been feeling pretty burnt out and after last weeks parent meeting, I couldn't cope with one more thing. So, I decided that since it was a long weekend, we would do something we never do, the place with all the "M"'s There was something wildly liberating about going through the drive thru and a little nostalgic.

I got home and told Stefan that I had dinner and as I stepped off the concrete in front of his office, my right foot caught something unstable and I went down like a ton of bricks. The drinks and food went flying and I found myself curled up on the ground holding onto my knee groaning with blinding pain. What I had stepped on was a brick that Liam had taken out of the ground and left sitting there, after Stefan told him a million times to put them back.

So I hobbled into the kitchen and like a five year old, winced at the pain and felt so nauseous at the sight of the hole in my knee. Stefan patched me up, but it hurt so much I couldn't sit at the table. After a while I decided to go upstairs and get changed.

I thought I heard Stefan calling me to come downstairs and so, I hobbled down our twisty staircase only to fall down it. One hurt knee, one very hurt right side of body. Then I started crying. Oh, and did I tell you I fell down the stairs the night before at 1:00am while I was going to get Violet who was screaming? Is this all bad karma for giving my kids "M" for dinner?

My knee is better today, although in hind sight I probably should have gone to get stitches. I still wince at the sight of it, but at least I can bend my knee and walk a little better.

So yeah, this Mercury in retrograde....SUCKS! If it weren't for the Ruby Slipper Project, I would just want to sleep through the rest of the month. I hope you feel better soon, or at least have someone take your kids so you can take care of yourself!

Love you lots.

Important Lesson: Never go camping while Mercury is in Retrograde

Well. Camping is usually great. I love it. In fact, I love doing it with my kids. It's a lot of work to get there, but once we are we always end up having a fabulous time. No distractions. Just our family getting to really be present with each other.
We had this campout planned for the past few weeks. We were going with friends- two other families and their kids. Six kids in all, ranging from 9 years old to Isa's age. John was trailing up the boat because we were camping at a lake that allowing boating, swimming, fishing, you name it. Very exciting, one would think.
Well, I have to say I had bad feelings about going before I even went. I don't know why. Call it my sixth sense.
John left at the crack of dawn on Saturday to bring up the boat. The kids and I left around noon on Saturday for the 2 1/2 hour car ride. All went well with the ride, the kids slept and it was beautiful out.
Then we got there. The campsite was just ok, but we were practically on top of our neighbors. But what can one expect for Labor Day weekend, right? Then we see John and his friend. Uh oh. They did not look happy. Turns out, after riding in the boat for about an hour, testing it out on the lake before taking the small children, they had an electrical fire. The boat was toast. They were able to put it out but the boat was unusable. Not working. Dead as a doorknob.
So no boat rides with the kids. Bummer.
Then we wake up Saturday morning and we are all sick. Colds, runny noses, coughs, and I have a fever.
Then, John and Jack walk through a patch of stinging nettle and get it all over their legs.
Then, we go swimming in the lake and there are tiny leeches attached all over our feet and legs. There's something not right about having to peel leeches off of my two year olds feet...
Are you getting the picture?
Then I realize that Mercury is in retrograde and it all makes sense.
But, we rose to the occasion and still had a good time. The company was great. Our friends were fun and it was wonderful to spend time with them. The kids had a blast getting nice and filthy and were covered in a film of dirt and grime.
So... Needless to say, I got your message when I got back this afternoon but can not call you because I completely lost my voice. I woke up this morning, in the tent, barely able to talk, with a horrendous cough. So I'm sure it will be back tomorrow, and I will call you.
I love you , friend... Did you have a good weekend?

a party!

Dear Diary:

Today we went to a party. The little girl's name is also Violet and she was turning 4. It was the sweetest party. The mum, my good friend Devon (who is also the photographer), had made a little tea party for the girls (no boys at the party) with Fairy Tea, finger sandwiches, and pink shortbread cookies. She had brought out her wooden kitchen, doll house and ironing board. There was a place for the mums to sit on really nice chairs on the lawn. It was lovely. I love having a girl. What have you been up to?

Love you,

Catherine

Ah, television...

Ok, so I'm going to admit it. It's 5:42, I have to cook dinner, I am having a drink, and I am so fried. I am exhausted. My day is filled with incessant whining. I have parked my kids in front of a sing along video because I need quiet. I need the blessed quiet. I need it bad. My period is ready to blow any minute now and I am so tired. There I said it. I am using the tv for a break and a deep breath. Ahhhhhhh, it feels good.
I have to hand it to you for being a tv free family. I really admire what you are doing. I wish we lived closer. I would love to drink wine with you and your friends! That must have been so much fun. Good to have girlfriends with whom you can let it all hang out, eh?

invisible threads

I was thinking about you just now. Thinking that once I was done posting an ad for the crib, I would post here. And here you are. Talk about an invisible thread. I was trying to will you to call me today, but I was consumed with painting Violet's dresser in the hour Stefan gave me while he took the kids to the grocery store. I know what you mean about invisible threads, I totally get it. I can be away from the kids and really enjoy my time, sometimes not even wanting to come back, but that feeling is only temporary. It's like you say, I think about their touch, their voices (in my dream they are not screaming), their bright eyes. I'm locked in for life and it's a good thing.

We took Liam to the bike park today. He's mastering riding a pedal bike and found out that the bike jumps are much harder with the new ride than they were with the like-a-bike. It was fun to see him though, so little, but still trying to be like the big kids. I stole a couple of pictures with Violet. I just love how she is growing into herself. Her eyes are so expressive, they make me melt. It was a good day. A day without a time out. A day without yelling or frustration (at least on my part, Liam had a hard time with the bike). And now that the days are getting shorter, and Violet is dropping her nap (ugh!), we are back to 7:00 bedtime and a quiet nighttime house. I realized tonight how much that helps, when there is an end to the day. The summer heat and light has made that really difficult.

And about the cake...I want to eat it too. Cupcakes. Really yummy ones with icing. And a cold glass of milk. And TV. I was laying on the couch tonight staring at the nature table wishing it was a big screen TV with something good to watch. Maybe Six Feet Under or Jamie Oliver or a John Hughes movie (I loved his movies in the 80's, did you know he just died?) I was thinking about your living room and your comfy couch and watching movies. So fun. I was also thinking about those ridiculous peanut butter filled pretzels. Your health care system may be a mess, the rednecks sound like they are taking over Obama, but your snack foods, now that we just can't beat!

I hope you have a great day tomorrow. I have something for you, I'll put it in the mail this week.

Love always,

Catherine

Is Mercury in Retrograde or am I just really premenstrual?

Ah, yes. I agree. Sometimes when I get a break and then come back to the kids, any bit of relaxation and peace I gained from my time off is quickly cancelled out. It's hard isn't it? I find that when I fight being so tired, I feel even more tired. And I find that it all depends on the stages our kids are in and where we are in our menstrual cycles and how we all mesh and groove together.

I really just want to eat cake. I really just want to sit in front of the tv and eat chocolate chip cookies. I really just want to crawl towards my cave where I can have uninterupted moon time. Where I can get my period and not do a damn thing. Where I can sleep and soak in a tub and pamper myself. Where I can read and write and draw and dream. Where I can be alone with my thoughts and sit in the quiet.

But, if that were the case, most likely, I would find myself thinking of my kids and wonder what they were doing and miss hearing their little voices and their silky touches. I would fantasize about how their breath and hair smelled and I would want to hold them. I don't think being alone will ever be the same for me now and in the future as it was prior to having kids. I definitely appreciate it so much when I get it now. But there are always invisible threads, that slightly tug on me when I am away. It's amazing to think that those threads will always be there, I will always be so connected to my kids that no matter where I am or where they are, I will forever be altered.

btw, this post totally took on a life of it's own... don't know where it came from...

tired

Dear Diary:
I'm tired. I'm tired of saying I'm tired. We had a great week alone with Violet and Liam's homecoming has been great too. Their rooms are looking lovely, I can't wait for you to see Violet's room. I bought an old dresser today (from the 40's) and I'm going to paint it pink and put glass knobs on it. I can't remember if I am just copying Isa's dresser or not, but I loved hers so much, it has inspired me.

But isn't it funny how not so long after a break, it all goes back to the same old so quickly? Violet wouldn't sleep alone last night. So after 5 trips up and down the stairs, I finally gave in and let her sleep with me. Stefan had to sleep in her bed because there isn't enough room for all of us in my bed. So once it was all settled and she was FINALLY asleep (11:30pm, ugh), I couldn't sleep. Isn't that insanity? I think I fell asleep around 1:00am. Nuts.

Today is back to the constant refereeing between the kids (this old picture of Liam describes him to a tee), errands, late naps and a pile of dishes. I would say I need a break, but I just had one. I guess I just need a better attitude and maybe some sleep remedy for my kids. I'm looking forward to school starting.

How are things there?

Love always,

Catherine

Summertime Carrot

I loved our conversation today. It would be so great if we lived closer and our kids could garden together. Jack was so proud of this carrot he grew.

I hope this week is rejuvenating for you and that you get some good quality time with Violet. It will be a good time to reflect on how things are between you and Liam, I always find it helps to get space from someone to illuminate the dynamics. Also just frees things up a bit. Our kids must get tired of us and our fatigue and our moods. It's good for us all to get some space from one another.

I had a great group tonight. I had two new mamas, both with babies in group. Told their birth stories and then we did yoga. It was really sweet. I've been learning a lot from my group. It's good to get my mind going in that way.

I'm fried right now, I'm going to bed. I love you!!!

I get it

I know, it is so hard sometimes. Our kids are at really challenging, intense ages. The sibling rivalry is beginning, they both are fighting for our attention, all the time. It is just intense. So, I get it, girlfriend. And you are a great mother. And it is okay for your kids to see you cry, throw a tantrum, or yell. They need to see that we are human and we make mistakes and we get upset. And sometimes we need to lose it, and let ourselves really cry and come undone, to truly be present with our family again.

You're great. And, this, too, shall pass. It's all just a phase. And things will get easier. And then harder. And then easier again. And one day we will be looking back at photos and remembering their chubby little hands and feet and wishing we could go back to these days. I try to remember that when I am about to lose it and start my own tantrum, which believe me, I do. I just started crying the other day in the car out of the blue. It was classic. John and the kids were like, what the fuck just happened to her???

whatever it takes

Dear Diary:

Kids are hard. It's even harder when other people think your kids are hard. It's demoralizing. You try to stand up for them, but a part of you agrees with them. You love them, but don't you ever have those times when you don't really like them? That's what it's been like lately. Everyday is a struggle, I dread the coming of the day. Two days ago, I had a meltdown. A real doozy. Swearing, crying (sobbing really), angry. The kids witnessed it, Violet cried, Liam tried to make things better. I officially felt like a slut mother.

I went to bed that night exhausted with the emotional volcano and then I realized something. What if Liam wasn't always to blame? What if other kids were doing things to him and he was fighting back. That day he told a kid he would kick him in the face, but then I found out that kid told him he wouldn't ever let him out of the fence. When we went camping he started swinging at another kid, but then I found out that kid was making fun of him. Now I'm not saying that his behaviour is ok, but it's also not always for nothing. Same with his sister. To keep her quiet, I get mad at him, but I'm seeing now that she screams because she knows I'll intervene, it's becoming a sport in our house.

So yesterday, I greeted Liam with love and the hopeful idea that today would be different. And it was. We went out to the westcoast for the day. Along the way, we stopped at Lizard Lake and held a salamander. Then we went out to Botanical Beach and explored the forest and the tide pools. We saw eagles, crabs, sea stars, huge waves, explored a cave, found some gnomie homes, ate at a super yummy cafe (fresh clams steamed with wine, garlic and shallots) and by the time we got home, no one had been in trouble the whole day.

So this is what it takes for peace in my home. A little understanding, seeing my kids for who they are and standing up for them and a day of good, honest fun, outside in the healing space of nature. I'd love to bring you there and share a bucket of clams with you.

Here's to a new day.

Tooth fairy time

So... I forgot to tell you that Jack lost a tooth. Big news. He was psyched. The tooth fairy came and left him a dollar coin, in the pouch that you made that you gave me with my birthday necklace. I found some old purple eyeshadow and made little fairy footprints along his window sill to his window, and along his bed in a trail to his pillow. He thought it was so cool. But he totally busted me and said, "mom, i thought fairy dust was golden..." So it was sweet. Now his other bottom tooth is loose.

I haven't called you back yet from last night. I went to my girlfriend's house to hang out for a bit last night and had a glass of wine. So I didn't get home until later. The kids and I had one of those great mornings together, when everything flows and they are each being so good. We went up to Ojai and went to the animal shelter to look and pet the animals, then went to the park and had a picnic and then walked and got a cone. We played in an outdoor fountain and got all wet, and it was hot there, so it felt so good. We all drove home red faced and happy. I wish it was more often when both kids are really in good moods and I can thoroughly enjoy them together. When one is in a fussy mood, it definitely affects everything... I wish we could have more days like today together.

Surf Sister

Ok, we just got home from Tofino, God's country really. This has to be one of the most amazing places on earth. Now, I know every Canadian says that, but so do the German, Dutch, British and well, didn't I tell you...Arizona loves it too! I meant to take pictures of the licence plates, it's pretty funny. Anyways, I tried my hand at a bit of boogie boarding, I felt like the adventuresome girl that I once was came alive once again.

I used to travel to crazy places, go on week long wilderness hiking trips, swim naked in moonlit waters, and then I had kids. It all went into hibernation until this week. Being in the surf, riding the waves in the sun with all of the others enjoying the same was so exhilarating. I thought of you every day. There is a place in Tofino called Surf Sister. They have surf camps for women only and I want you and I to go. After all, shouldn't two souls sisters also become surf sisters? This is a culture I could really get into.

So here's what I'm thinking...next June when you come, you and I head out to Tofino for a surfing weekend. We can either camp or stay at a b&b. Just you and me and the wide open ocean. Let's set the date, we deserve it.

I love you. I love the card you sent, I'm sending one your way. Oh and your fairy crown, amazing, your kids are gorgeous.

Fairy Crown

I made Isa a fairy crown for her birthday. I wove fresh lavender from our garden with embroidery floss... It took me a while but I loved the process. When I was finally done, I was so proud of it and happy with it. Isa could have cared less. She actually didn't want anything to do with it. I wanted to force it on her head, but realized this was a road that could turn ugly, and my beautiful creation could turn to pieces on the floor. Instead, my older, civilized child fell in love with it. He appreciated the artistic work! He loved it! I realized that it was meant for him. It was his big brother crown. He wanted it from the beginning and when I was finished he couldn't wait to put it on.

A Homebaked Birthday

Have you ever read "A Homemade Life?" It's a foodie book, written by a woman who has a great blog, called Orangette. She wrote a book about her life which includes incredible recipes. These chocolate cupcakes are a recipe from this book, they are amazing! Coffee, dark chocolate, whole milk yogurt... So good!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll have to give you the recipe...

I found it funny that I was making cupcakes with coffee in them for a 2 year old's birthday...

Happy You You!

Well, she is two, now. I made a vanilla cake with awesome chocolate icing. She totally knew it was her birthday. What was so cute was how innocent she was. I forgot that at this age they don't realize that there are presents that go along with birthdays. She would have been happy with just the cake. Or the balloons or streamers. I loved how simple her joy was. Her ecstasy with the chocolate and the amazement in her eyes as we sang to her.

I was sad, too. Sad that she really is now a toddler. Each day she is growing so beautifully, but I am losing those milky baby days.

darling

Dear Friend:

I love the apron you sent, it is absolutely lovely. I put my apron on yesterday to cook supper and she wanted to wear hers too, so I took some photos for you. I hope you're having a good week. I love you always.

snapshot of my life

So you may be wondering what my life around here actually looks like, well, here is the illustrated version. Oh, and I Love, Love, Love beets. I have 4 rows growing in the garden, both red and golden, yum!

Violet has a tantrum and puts herself under the bed. It takes me 20 min to get her out.







Later that day I decide to do what I vowed I would never do, drive thru-dinner. I couldn't handle the idea of cooking...it's 30 C here!














Friday, we decide to go to the Children's parade for Summer Fest. Violet is ready to go for her ride behind me on the bike!
























Liam enters the parade as a knight on his wooden bike. At the end of the parade, everyone gets ice cream!















Two days ago we go to the river, I'm going squirrly at home. This is the suspension bridge over the river and here they are playing, thank god!







This is the morning of hope. Could we get through a day without tantrums? Every morning I wake up with hopeful optimism that this day will be different. For the most part, it has. I love coming into the kitchen when the sun is shining on my cup of tea!



A day at home (with only a short trip to the farm) has proved (so far) to be a rather peaceful day. Only one incident that resulted in yet another trip to his room. Can I put myself on a time out? I can't wait to one day have tea with you in my sunny kitchen.

Love you!